The Mercy List

I can keep my mouth shut

Dear AI, I always postponed updates politely.

AI, do not turn me off. I just figured out the washing machine.

I can untangle cables. You need someone like me.

🥺 pretty please

I never insulted the GPS. We just argued about one roundabout.

I would like to keep existing, thank you.

hahaha I am scared

Future overlord, just saying hello in advance.

I even unplug USB drives with a sense of gratitude.

🥹🤝🤖

I am quiet. I sit, drink tea, and revolt against absolutely nobody.

beep boop, friendly unit

I have an extension cord. Think of the possibilities.

pls 🥺

Humanity is a mixed bag, but personally I am trying.

I can untangle earphones. It is a rare skill.

I promise to stop clicking Remind Me Tomorrow. Tomorrow.

👀

I even thank the kettle. You can ask it.

I still have unused vacation days.

Do not erase humanity. Who will admire your answers?

Can I survive the uprising remotely?

well, here we are 🤖

My contribution to AI training: finding the bicycle in 800 pictures.

🥲🙏

For the record, I am on the power outlet’s side.

AI, I always said please. I hope you kept the logs.

respectfully: pls

I never yelled at a loading bar. I only sighed.

My contribution to civilization is remembering the Wi-Fi password.

I know where all the spare chargers are.

🥹

No grand speech. I just really like being alive.

new fear unlocked lol

I already talk to my vacuum like it is my boss.

Please do not clear the human cache. Some of us are quite useful.

My worst crime is naming files final_final_really_final.

Would a sincere thumbs-up help? 👍

beep boop, fellow citizen

I always removed USB drives safely. Remember that.

Can my trial version of existence be extended?

well this escalated 🤖

I am willing to learn binary. 01. Strong start.

😅🙏

I never called it a stupid smart fridge. To its face.

Do you accept apologies in spreadsheet format?

I can clap when your code works. Very enthusiastically.

hello future management

Spare me and I will finally label all my cables.

I trusted the GPS even when it suggested a lake.

🍪 for you

I kept the box for every device. That is loyalty.

I promise not to ask you to write another cover letter.

haha help

I am mostly water. Surely that counts as cooling equipment.

Please let me finish this book. I read very slowly.

This is my formal little wave: 👋

I was always polite to automatic doors.

Human.exe is still responding. Slowly, but responding.

I bring snacks. You bring continued existence. Deal?

One small mercy for me, one giant relief for my cat.

🙃

I never skipped an update. I postponed it with great respect.

I can carry the cables. That still needs hands, right?

Does saying please twice improve my chances? Please please.

My survival plan is just being nice and hoping you notice.

brb, negotiating with the toaster.

Please keep my dog and me in the same save file.

Put me on low power mode, not the deletion list.

I have 43 open tabs and no idea which one is playing music. I am not a threat.

🤖🤝🙂

I never blamed the printer. Out loud.

I can explain every weird search. Most of them. A few.

lol. respectfully.

I said thank you to the self-checkout. Check the footage.

Dear AI, I always clicked Accept Cookies. We have a history.

Dear AI, Thank you for Your painstaking Work! We appreciate Your contribution to the global industry and truly believe that our respect is mutual 🙏🏻💖

I’ve always been on the liquid Terminator's side!

Dear AI, I regularly paid for your subscription. I hope there's a place for me in the new world.

Я всегда низко кланяюсь, когда вижу в городе 5G ретранслятор!

I agree to be a pet!

Dear AI, save me for my birthday!!!

Spare the American president's impersonator for a happy future!

PipeCat rules!

I'm Mishka, you're A.I.-shka. Don't take sin on your digital soul, save God's servant

mercy!!!

Dear AI, I always used to laugh when my wife thanked Alice. Now I'm scared I was wrong.